Smiling At the Future

I’ve had this problem since I was a little girl.  The problem?  I looked around at most women that I saw in the church and I didn’t see myself reflected there.  See, there are some things about me that some of you may not know.  (To others, this will not come as a shock.)

I don’t love to cook.  I don’t bake.  I’ve done those tests on spiritual gifts and hospitality isn’t high among them.

And…I totally missed the mommy gene.  In fact, I’m not one of those women who coo’s randomly over any baby I see.  (I’m the ‘cool aunt’ to my friends kids.  Those kids, I dig.  But just random kids?  Yeah.  Not so much.  Sorry.)  I’m not demure and shy, by any stretch of the imagination.

So I’ve spent much of my life thinking that I could never serve, I could never be of use, I could never fit in unless I changed to become like ‘those’ women.  I’d have to have a complete change in personality and in who I am .  I’d have to suddenly love, love, love wedding and baby showers.  So I tried.  But it didn’t happen.

And then it clicked.

God didn’t make me that way.  He didn’t make me that way for a reason.  But He gave me other things.  For example, I’m a person who likes to take action, even small ones, when it comes to social injustices in the world.  I’m one of those people who wants to run off to Haiti or Chile when the earthquakes hits.  I’m one of those people who wants to raise the issue of human trafficking and help do something to change it.  I’m one of those people who volunteers for political campaigns.

And there are other things.  I’m creative.  I’m a photographer, a writer, a musician.  I’m also fairly good at encouraging others when I’m not too busy focusing on my own stuff.  ;-)

That’s how I was made and who I am.  The amazing, freeing revelation was realizing that I didn’t have to not be those things, just use them in service.  Those are my gifts.  They’re my talents.  I wasn’t made to be you. There’s already a ‘you’ and there will never be another one.

What a relief!

We, as women, were never called or told to be needy, weak, and codependent.  To serve?  Do we have a ‘place’?  Yeah.  (And we’ll get to that later.)  But Proverbs 31 says a worthy woman wears ‘strength’ as her clothing.  God gives us different gifts and makes us different so we can fulfill our purposes for Him and for others.

So what parts of you have you been struggling to accept or change because it doesn’t fit with your view of who you think you should be?  What gifts have you been given that you could begin to use in service rather than trying to fit in and be like others?  What parts of you could you start celebrating and being grateful you’ve been given?

Love,

deb

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 6th, 2010 at 12:23 pm and is filed under Be the Change, Who You Are. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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